"Second" weddings can equally be beautiful

Getting married for the second time is not unusual as almost 40 per cent of wedding ceremonies today would involve someone who has been married before. What was once regarded as dishonourable and unworthy of celebrating  has today become acceptable and  there are many reasons to rejoice with couples involved.

There are many questions most couples marrying again often ask: Can I wear white? Can we have an elaborate wedding? Can we have a religious ceremony?  You can have your dream wedding the second time around but there are certain restrictions and sometimes dilemma which come with such marriages. But with experience and maturity, you are sure to breeze through them with ease.

Who is coming to the wedding

Announcing your wedding to your families and friends may have mixed  reactions, for those who truly care about you, it’s been long awaited news and the mood will be joyous but for others who may have their own reservations, it could be everything but pleasant. Another issue is deciding who will be invited to your wedding considering the circumstances, especially if you still have a close relationship with your former in-laws. You may want to invite them but ensure that your spouse is carried along and understands your intentions too.

Children involved          

Sensitivity is the word when announcing your intending marriage to your children from your previous marriages as most children would naturally frown at sharing their parent with a new man or woman. But it is important to engage them in dialogue which also allows them to express their concerns. It is also important that you lay the cards on the table for them and prepare them for the future. The more they know now the better for the inevitable changes and the more transparent you are with them now the better for all concerned in the end.

Do it your way

For many couples marrying again, it is a great opportunity to do something that radiates your personalities and hold your purse strings full with your own ideas of a truly unforgettable wedding. It is also important that you do not try to confine your partner into past images of your last wedding as this is not your second or third, it is your first wedding as a couple and a fresh start. An elaborate white wedding may have seemed right in your twenties but in your forties, older and wiser, you may prefer a small intimate affair as you are more likely going to pay for your own wedding. On the other hand, you may also want to throw a big wedding if that fits into your lifestyles as couples if money is not an issue.

You can wear white

White is synonymous with purity and virginity and many brides marrying for the second time are usually uncomfortable  wearing it. They prefer the off shades of ivory or cream but that is just a myth. White simply is the colour for celebration and if you absolutely feel like wearing it, it is your own celebration. You can wear white if that is your choice. You may also prefer to wear a less traditional wedding dress or a cocktail dress depending on your style of wedding. A veil is perfectly acceptable and appropriate too if you are having a religious blessing.

Notes

The decision to marry again for many may have come after years of fear and apprehensions having gone through distressed marriages. The freedom and confidence to move forward may only be found in a second attempt and celebrating your new lives together is a great way to kick start the journey.

There may be restrictions to the kind of marriage you can have in terms of certain religious rites but you can make those promises and commitments with just as much passion  second time around as long as you are able to see it as a fresh start and determined to relive your wedding dreams with someone you truly love.         

GOOD LUCK